Ebb and Flow

I try to revive the spirit

Of the works which lead me to You
I tread the path stumbling upon little stones, (and) then am left behind

My heart attaches itself to the world; I cling to evanescent dust
Realisation, a mercy from you penetrates these ears deaf
And causes the cover on this heart to melt

I turn to You and plead respite
Never again, never again
Will I commit sin – O Allah, forgive me

You unlock all doors
Suddenly a most passionate breeze takes hold of me -
I am taken into the realm of calm

And am no more, in Your sight, one despised
I feel the bounties overflow as my nose and fore touch the ground
I whisper unto You words soft and tender

Ah how ironical
These sweet utterances from a heart once covered;
One stained by careless hands

And then I feel Your existence:
For all doubt but You
And all hurt but You

"Oh what exalted disposition, I must say
None but a Lord can be such!"
I try to come closer- I stand before You with soiled hands, tongue, eyes, ears and limbs

As I step into prayer, I submit my whole self to You
Allah is Most great, I remind myself
As I recite, bow down, and prostrate

I feel my life renewed.
Thank You O Lord, I truly do feel You
Please guide me unto the path so that I may worship You and that I may please You

And grant me, so that I be the man
Who gives his all...
O Allah, indeed I submit to You

I turn to the Turner of Hearts
And feel as if I’m the jack of all trades
As if “my” sweet words were the cause of this bounty immense

As if my “righteous” deeds tipped the balance whole
As if my sins- mere flies warded off the tip of my nose
What! Hypocrisy still?

Deep-rooted, subtle, disturbing
A disease!!
…I see I have a long way to go

(Photo Credits: gettyimages.com)